My Life is in Transition Which Looks Like I’m Not Going Anywhere

Have you ever felt like you’re simply spinning your wheels? No matter what you try, or how hard you try to change, things just stay the same. That’s Wade Webster’s story at this present moment.

Case in point: my lease is up in a couple of months. That means I just received options for renewal lengths with varying rates depending on how long I choose to stay here.

A big part of me would love to move. I’ve been here almost seven years. A lot of bad memories have been built here.

Four years ago Barb moved out while I was hard at work one day. Last year the divorce was finalized.

March 3rd, 2014 I was broken into while I was in bed. Fortunately I was able to scare the intruders off before they took anything of value, except for a night of sleep and a vacation day.

A year later I gave the eulogy at my Mom’s funeral.

There are some good reasons to stay and pay the substantial increase in rent due to the incredible housing need in Plano.

I have a great city park within running distance where I get my aerobic workouts accomplished. That’s not easy to find in a big city.

I don’t have to think about where I have to go home to at the end of my workday. That may sound strange, but it makes sense to someone who sometimes gets confused when he drives back into the complex of cities he lives in while returning back from a driving run. Few employers find humor in a driver taking their truck, trailer and load to the wrong end of Dallas/Ft Worth. Oh, the life of a temporary driver.

My 700 square foot home has been one of the few constants in my life these seven years.

Clifford has been one of the other ones, but with over 200,000 miles on my van his days are getting numbered.

My church family has been by far my greatest asset in my life in Plano. That’s also the epicenter of this housing crunch I’m in. Any apartment that was cheaper is increasing in rent, too. The few that aren’t don’t have anybody moving out of them. I don’t blame them. I wouldn’t either.

I have today (Monday) to give a 60 day notice to vacate without paying additional penalties. The rates they sent me are supposed to hold until the end of next week. I have a few email leads out to some apartments I’m waiting to hear back from. Prayers are appreciated.

I’m still trying to get my business going helping local businesses with video marketing and other services. My unpredictable schedule makes that hard to launch properly. At this point I wish I never started this option with all the money I’ve sunk into it. When that catches on this will all change.

Sometimes even simple things get complicated lately. I walked up to the bank near me (another reason to stay here) to transfer money from my personal account to my business account to prepare to pay a loan tomorrow only to find the ATM machine being fixed. Now I have to re-walk the quarter mile this evening to accomplish that feat.

After driving most of last night (there’s that temporary crazy schedule again) I hope I can stay awake that long.

I’m just plain tired. I’m tired of being sleep deprived, tired of balancing bank accounts to stay afloat, tired of deciding where to live, tired of working crazy hours to have money in the bank at all.

It’s at times like this I turn it ALL over to God by reading Isaiah 40:28-31.

Do you not know?

Have you not heard?

The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles;

they will run and not grow weary,

they will walk and not faint.

I guess that means when I walk back up to the bank I won’t faint on the way there and back.

Sometimes even small victories are cause for great celebration.

Speaking of celebrations, maybe I can enjoy some of the Olympics this evening before I faint in bed tonight.

Prayers for strength, guidance, wisdom and whatever else you can think of are greatly appreciated.

Keep smiling.   Wade